News Ignored…

OK, so in my daily search for pirate news I’m stumbling across several stories I just don’t care about. Therefore, I won’t post them. If you really, really want to read every story about pirates, do your own Google search. It’s not hard.

What you won’t read here:

1) Keira Knightly done with PotC – No kidding. Her story arc is over, and it’s highly unlikely we’ll see any more of Elizabeth Swann. That said, it’s too early to know anything about anything about PotC 4, which makes all “news” at this time actually pointless gossip.

2) Talk Like a Pirate Day is coming – Again, no kidding. But to be fair, maybe not all readers know this (hint, it’s September 19th, and you can read all about it.) But just the same, I’m not going to link to every newspaper that has a story about “brush up on your pirate lingo” or “prepare to say ARRRR this Saturday”, etc. etc.

3) Modern pirates have taken hostages, raided a ship, etc. – There’s nothing fun or romantic about modern piracy. So I’m not gonna promote it here.

4) Johnny Depp is doing something – This one’s actually a pet peeve of mine. If you want to be a Johnny Depp fan, fine. But this isn’t a Johnny Depp site, and unless what he’s doing has something to do with pirates, then Depp news is not pirate news. Willy Wonka ain’t a pirate, nor is Sweeny Todd. Edward Scissorhand’s off the chart entirely. Maybe you could make a case for the dude he played in “Blow”, but then see #3 above.

So there you have it – a few things you’re not going to find here. Just thought you should know.

Comments (3)

  1. The Quartermaster

    Well done Bilge. You’re like the spam (grog) filter that actually works. Thank you for your commitment to actual news and not posting gossip and the like.

    News: Bilge takes on the world of news, scouring the depths for everything piraty and JUST for us. Hundreds died.

  2. Coastie

    Personally, I like all except #3. Although not quite romantic, I find modern piracy quite interesting, and in many cases, not much different than the old days. Sure, there are the para-military groups with automatic weapons, but there are also those who sneak on board by climbing the anchor chain, tie up a duty watchman, and assault the captain with ‘long knives’ or machetes, steal the money, and leave.

    However, since Bilgemunky writes the articles on this site, I’m happy to submit to them.

  3. Bilge (Post author)

    Nothing wrong with having an interest in modern piracy. And were this an academically driven site, I might cover it more. But truth be told, we’re a bunch of pirate cheerleaders around these parts – rah rah pirates, aren’t they neat and the like. While Golden Age crimes are far enough removed that I feel perfectly comfortable turning a blind eye to the atrocities committed in favor of the the friendlier Robin Hood, freedom-loving aspects, I just can’t feel the same about robberies and murders being committed today.

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