On Stranger Tides Full Length Trailer!

You’ve been waiting for it, so here it is! The preview for next year’s Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides:

It looks interesting, to be sure. And I wonder at the clear elements I see from the book (Fountain of Youth, Zombies) balanced against the clearly non-book parts (mermaids, the entire cast except for Blackbeard). Don’t get me wrong, I hope they make the best movie they can, regardless of which side of the “true to the book” spectrum that means. I’m just eager to see what that balance turns out to be. Sadly, you know what I’m not eager to see? PENELOPE CRUZ. Seriously, I look at this movie and I don’t see Johnny Depp and Ian McShane, I see Jack Sparrow and Blackbeard. But with Cruz I see the same feisty latina I see in virtually every movie she’s in. These movies have always been character driven, and I don’t see a character when I look at Cruz, I just see an A-list fifth wheel thrown in for no good reason. I’ll gladly eat crow should I be wrong and ‘Angelica’ turns out to be a bundle of pirate awesome, but right now she just makes me sad and cranky.

Also interesting in this preview were the two unnamed fresh-faced youngsters – the guy and the girl (I think she was behind bars.) Could this mean some elements of Jack Shandy and Beth Hurwood will find their way into the film afterall, I wonder?

Comments (10)

  1. Mark Keating

    Agreed. Cruz is a latin Natalie Portman. Any movie she’s attached to will both suck and blow.

  2. Capt. Thomas Foolery

    I wouldn’t go so far as to say everything Cruz has been in has been bad, but action film-wise, pretty much. I hope that the sinking feeling I get watching her in the trailer is for naught and the character is actually worth having around.

    I read this somewhere else, but it struck me as being fairly accurate: Depp doesn’t look so much like Captain Jack Sparrow as he does Johnny Depp dressed in the costume of Jack Sparrow. Double that, for Cruz. I wonder if it’s a fourth installment curse – Indiana Jones didn’t look as, for lack of a better word, authentic as in the other films and Sparrow looks the same in this.

    Trying not to get too excited, especially after the colossal let-down the 4th Indy film was. Please don’t nuke the fridge, POTC 4!

  3. Capt. Anne Paisley

    I guess it puts me at an advantage that I haven’t seen any other movies with Penelope Cruz! I would rather see him with a feisty Latina, though, even if she’s not particularly original, than some simpy bimbo. I just hope he gets to point something else at her besides a sword.

    Eye makeup’s wrong, hair’s too light. What did they do with Vee?

  4. Ol' Chumbcket

    She’s got Catherine Zeta-Jones part from Zorro.

    Looks all fun and adventurous and all, but I have the same complaint about this trailer that I had about all three predecessors. It’s NOT a pirate movie, not at all. It’s a monster movie – zombies and witchcraft and curses and mermaids and all that – in which pirates are almost innocent bystanders, or as innocent as pirates can be.

    But you’re right. Blackbeard looks awesome.

  5. Captn Killy

    I’m going to hold all judgement until i see it !

    Ok i lied i can’t wait ! I’m ripe for another Pirate movie one way or another………. I hope they make five and six aswell !
    What can i say , i’m easy to please……….. I wanna see it now ! Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

  6. Squint-Eye

    While I agree that Penelope Cruz doesn’t have a ton of acting range, but if the character is written for her and plays to her strengths (whatever those may be) it could work.

    What I get from the trailer is a whole load of Johnny being Jack, and while that can be fun I would like more Barbossa and Blackbeard. So color me cautiously optimistic, for now.

    Is it me or does the young girl “Beth Hurwood??” look like she’s a mermaid at one point in the preview, and if so are we going to get a Pirates of the Caribbean/ Little Mermaid mash up?

  7. Capt. Thomas Foolery

    Sing it, Sebastian!

    “Under the sea…under the sea…darling it’s better down where it’s wetter take it from meeeeee.”

    Okay. Number one, I know I just forfeited a good quarter of my pirateyness for knowing the lyrics to a Little Mermaid song. And two, I never realized how dirty that song was until now.

    As happy as I am with Ian McShane being Blackbeard, I am VERY disappointed in the costume. I just always pictured Blackbeard with a larger than life costume – a giant, grant, scarlet coat and a huge, terrifying beard to his waist. The costume I get instead: paltry and pleathery. Meh.

  8. Jim Glass

    Oh boy. It seems there’s three camps that one can fall into regaridng this movie (I’m sure there are more, but the people I know fall into one of the main three). Those that are happy there’s another Pirates movie, those that are happy that there’s another Pirates movie – but have reservations, and those that are happy there’s another Pirates movie – and feel that Penelope Cruz will drag it down to the Locker. I’m firmly in the middle. I love this franchise. I think we all do. However, I have to agree with Bilge, I don’t see a character. I see an added star, just because Disney could. I agree with Chumbucket, her part of ‘fiesty, capable, independent sword swinging heroine’ has been done before – in Zorro. I’m not going to speculate here as to why she has a SEVERE latin accent, and her daddy, ol Blackbeard hisslef, does not, but it strikes me as an oddity (o’course, since Blackbeard had numerous wives and I’m going to guess numerous offspring, it’s not out of the relam of possibility, just something that may confuse someone not so up to speed on thier pirate lore). In any case, I hope Disney does right by the book. It was a fantastic read, and I’d hate to see it parted out just because Disney wanted some of the content and not all. Until then, I’ll await with apprehensive anticipation…

  9. Ol' Chumbcket

    Oh, I’m eager to see it.

    I just wish someone would make a pirate movie. Oh well, for no I’ll just put on my DVD of Captain Blood.

  10. Oderlesseye

    If Eye had PENELOPE in my Movie.. Her character would have been shared out to tha crew! However, Eye do Look forward to seein POTC regardless of her being in it..

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