Pirates of the Caribbean: Not Cool

Posted on September 13th, 2009 in News

That’s right – my suggestion for the title of the fourth Pirates of the Caribbean film is Pirates of the Caribbean: Not Cool. Why? Because the rumormill all over the internet is saying that the title has been released as Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, which just happens to be the title of an incredibly awesome pirate book that’s been around for twenty years or so and has absolutely nothing to do with Disney. The way I see it, there are three ways this happens, and they all suck:

  1. Disney “didn’t know” the book On Stranger Tides existed, which is BS because Disney surely has entire departments that research this sort of thing.
  2. Disney stole the title idea, which, as stated, sucks.
  3. Disney felt inspired by the book and the use of the title reflects some sort of arrangement between Disney and Tim Powers, the author of the book, which indicates that Disney has no original pirate ideas of its own and therefore has no business making a fourth film. Plus, it makes it trickier for the real On Stranger Tides to ever be a movie someday.

So yeah, if this rumor proves true then Disney is utterly failing to impress.

16 comments


Written by Bilge

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16 Responses to 'Pirates of the Caribbean: Not Cool'

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  1. …but wait, there’s more.

    Disney’s “On Stranger Tides” will feature steampunkers, air zeplins, and wormholes through outerspace.

    I’m curious what Tim Powers has to say about all of this.

    Red Beard

    13 Sep 09 at 9:30 pm

  2. Oh…

    Nail + Coffin = POTC4

    Red Beard

    13 Sep 09 at 9:31 pm

  3. I read somewhere that Tim Powers signed away the rights to Disney, on the condition that he would be allowed to appear in the film as an extra (though I suspect there were lots of doubloons and pieces of eight involved as well).

    Speaking of cool pirate novels; have you ever read ‘The Pyrates’ (1983) by George MacDonald Fraser? I think you might like it.

    Captain Falkenberg

    14 Sep 09 at 3:44 am

  4. Yeah, I’ve heard the steampunk rumors as well, but am hoping desperately that they’re false. Steampunk elements in a PotC movie would be a great disservice to both genres -they’re entirely different time periods, and I doubt steampunks are going to want a bunch of Jack Sparrows at their conventions anymore than pirates want jetpacked librarians at theirs. But since many of the less creative enthusiasts get their marching orders from PotC, such a merger on screen would surely doom both subcultures to a hopeless influx of wrongness.

    Regarding The Pyrates, aye, it’s s splendid book. Reviewed it some good while back.

    Bilge

    14 Sep 09 at 7:37 am

  5. and yet people give me the weirdest looks when I tell them that Disney is evil. E-Vile!

    Doglock Hawk

    14 Sep 09 at 11:14 am

  6. Disney just getting in the pirate mood already stealing titles and plots lines from whatever they want. I’m ok with it as long as i get another 4 hour movie that is as violent and cut throat as the last pirates. Hope they don’t aim for pg 13 and just go straight for Arrrrr rated!

    Tad

    14 Sep 09 at 12:06 pm

  7. Sooo… am I the only one who’s actually excited about the prospect of Disney adapting On Stranger Tides into the next PotC movie? I always thought the movies had a lot in common with the book, and I think there’s merit in the plot. It’s considerably better than the plots for PotC 2 and 3, after all. And maybe Disney will actually give it a better ending than Tim Powers did.
    Of course, it won’t be a straight-up adaptation of the book, but I’m perfectly happy enjoying the book for its own merits and this film for entirely different ones. Assuming they don’t make a COMPLETE hash of it. But then, that’s always a matter of opinion anyway.

    Captain Mccool

    14 Sep 09 at 11:22 pm

  8. I loved PotC, but it seemed like they ripped off a lot of Power’s book. If their is some kind of collaboration between the evil empire and Power’s I’d really like to see some awesome puppetry and a little voodoo in the mix.
    I realized with PotC’s release that the odds of ‘On Stranger Tides’ ever making it to the screen were slim to none.

    Sutcliffe

    15 Sep 09 at 1:45 am

  9. Well, I’m holding my opinion for three reasons:

    1. “On Stranger Tides” was an already existing verse when Tim Powers used it, so Disney may have been inspired independently (unlikely).

    2. It may not actually end up being the final title. POTC 2 was originally “Into the Abyss”, and POTC 3 was originally “Uncharted Waters”. It may just be the working title at this point.

    3. If they have bought the rights from Tim Powers, it may not necessarily be a bad thing. It was a wicked cool book (except for the very end), and few movies follow books exactly. Maybe they will just use it for certain elements.

    Regarding the steampunk rumors, I think it’s bunk. They can’t be getting “back to basics” with steampunk. Remember the Zac Efron and Russell Brand rumors? Same category- somebody starts the rumor because they want to see it, and they think Disney will think it’s a great idea.

    Captain Paisley

    15 Sep 09 at 1:22 pm

  10. I don’t think it’s coincidental that the title’s are the same, or that AWE ended hinting at “the fountain of youth.” So, using the same title, and including a key plot element… yeah, I think there is a legal connection with the book.

    Nick Hoffman

    16 Sep 09 at 12:23 am

  11. Don’t be too sure Captain Paisley.
    …..On stranger tides….. is a line from a poem by William Ashbless.
    Do yourself a favor and google Mr. Ashbless. Funny stuff!

    Sutcliffe

    16 Sep 09 at 5:27 am

  12. I stand corrected.

    Captain Paisley

    16 Sep 09 at 11:45 am

  13. ‘Course my point three still holds and if true, would necessarily negate the steampunk thing, yes?

    Captain Paisley

    16 Sep 09 at 11:51 am

  14. Yeah, I think the Steampunk rumors are bunk too. I’m just really hoping to see a pirate film that actually has some pirating in it, heaven forbid. And luckily Tim Powers’ novel has plenty, right along with the voodoo and whatnot.

    P.S. I still think Russel Brand would make a badass Sparrow sibling, even if the whole “Sparrow Family” thing is kinda’ trite.

    Captain McCool

    16 Sep 09 at 11:46 pm

  15. Well, I saw on another site the response by one of the writers:

    There are elements that were similar, to On Stranger Tides so they suggested the title. (I don’t know if the Powers book was optioned prior to that or not. If it wasn’t this could be why. If it was, they had it in their back pocket so to speak.)
    Apparently there was never any intention to use “Captain Nemo” or steampunk elements in the film.
    And- there is not yet a start date for the film.

    gunpowder gertie

    17 Sep 09 at 1:22 am

  16. Am I the only one who…based on all of this logic…will expect Pirates of the Carribbean V to be called: Secret of Monkey Island?

    Red Beard

    20 Sep 09 at 9:48 pm

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