I had a conversation a while back with Patch, lead singer and principle songwriter of the Musical Blades. On asking him what other pirate bands he enjoyed, he expressed to my utmost surprise that he doesn’t listen to other pirate bands – not even a little bit. He does this so that his own writing will remain truly “his own”, wishing to follow his own instincts as to what pirate music can be rather than risk following the leads of others. While I myself could never fathom removing myself from the wealth of pirate music splendour that exists these days, I would offer the observation that Patch’s own abstinence seems to have served him, and the Musical Blades as a whole, rather well.

On their new album, Piratically Incorrect, the Musical Blades show themselves to be a band that fits the pirate mould to a T, while at the same time defying stereotypes and common trends. Their music is soulful yet strong – many of their songs speak of the sort of non-denominational spirituality one finds when clinging to the railing during a squall, while others demonstrate the irreverance one exhibits once making it safely ashore again (and thusly to the nearest tavern.)

In musical style, Piratically Incorrect boasts a unique mix. Where most of the songs feature strong, clear vocals and crisp, lively guitar work, others – such as Drink til She’s Pretty and Orsa Ad Finish (I Ran) [incidentally, NOT a pirate remake of Flock of Seagulls] – hail from the “drunken barn dance” school of music. The album begins with Blackbeard’s Demise, a spoken word piece set to music which sounds as though it were read from the headlines following the famous pirate’s decapitation. It’s an enjoyable piece, and an excellent introduction to this fine album. Next up is Johnny I Hardly Knew Ya – a manly sort of singin’ song, sort of a drinking man’s fight anthem.

Subsequent songs show the Musical Blade’s spiritual side – Old Triangle begins with a longing, and then continues with in a faster pace that nonetheless remains thoughtful. Pirate’s Plea, however, is exactly as the title would indicate – a cry to the heaven’s from a distraught sailor realizing the bleakness of his existence. Later songs share in this somber tone – So Dies the Captain is a touching tribute to a captain that’s passed on, while the bitter sweetness of Pirate’s Lullaby has a distinct Simon & Garfunkel bent to it. Ocean Burial and Maracaibo also carry a slow strength, while still finding their own original voices in turn.

While strength and strange reverence would seem the overriding theme of this album, there is still time made for the alternate side of the coin. Dirty ‘lil Accent is perhaps the most harmless sounding dirty song I’ve ever listened too – think smutty Beatles. Drink ’til She’s Pretty you can guess at yourself, while Ship Load o’ Bastards traces the distress of a sailor who learns that his entire crew is made up of his own illegitimate sons.

Bullgine, Spancill Hill, and What’ll it Be are all decent songs in their own rights, and nicely compliment the album while not entirely standing out. Bring on the Limey Birds, however, is worth a mention as it’s a fine tribute to the female performance group that has often shared the stage with the Musical Blades – a song distinctively funkier than the rest of the album, and a fun change of pace.

Piratically Incorrect definitely charts its own course in the Pirate-Core world – hardly “off the map” in the way of pirate rap or pirate jazz, but also not remotely the “same ‘ol same ‘ol” that can be the trap of pirate faire music. The Musical Blades are definitely a band not quite like any other, and their new album is well worth a listen.

Genre: Original pirate songs of varying non-traditional styles.
Rating: PG-13
Target Audience: Late teens to early retirement

Captain Darby O’Bill and His Matees 3, an album performed by a group of the same name (I mean, what are the odds?) is exactly the kind of pirate music I love best – meaning that it in no way sounds like any of the other pirate music I already love. Right from the first track, The Skulls of Skeleton Peak, and on through the entire album, this CD defies categorization of any kind save one – this is PIRATE MUSIC!

To a song, the music blends the styles of old time traditional with elements and instruments of the modern age. Accoustic guitars, electric bass, trombones, accordians, washboards, finger cymbals… On its own, the music would be a piratey joy to listen to, but Darby and his mates also have a wickedly perverse sense of humor, which when combined with the music makes for audio dementia in the most wonderful sort of way. The Little Dutch Boy is a touching, happy song about a young, innocent dutch boy being hauled off to sea to become a man. The lyrics are at times difficult to register, which is a shame because I’ve a feeling the song might edge on the riskee (and having checked the liner note lyrics, indeed it does.)

Following songs are easier to understand, while remaining wonderfully odd in their own rights – For a Pirate Everything’s Free, Margaret Mary, and The Barbary Coast are all great fun. Each maintains Darby’s distinctive sound and style, and yet each is unique. Bulva, the Wicked Wench, is the first of the album to have a previously familiar sound about it, but only because it has a smack of OZ about it – think about the title, and you’ll get an idea of what to expect.

Marina the Lovely Mermaid begins as a slower piece, but picks up pace later. But nothing can prepare you for Marina’s own lyrics in the song. Her “lovely melody” isn’t quite as femine as one might hope, but (s)he makes an effort, and that’s why it’s fun. Commodore Cortez is an adventure song, faster paced and full of danger. Hand of Glory is more of comradery and braggadocio, while The Ballad of Galley Schwaggennhann has a wonderful flow about it. One of my absolute favorite songs on the album, the vocals give almost an 80′s flair, while the lyrics are all pirate and drunken, fighting Irishmen.

Forty Days begins fast and furious, and continues the same. With lyrics like “Yo-ho, the dary-o, it’s the pirate’s life that’s never been told”, it maintains the strong pirate themes that have been standard throughout the album, along with the same outstanding, fun instrumentals. Concluding things is Dutch Harbor. An odd track amongst odd tracks, it begins slow and sing songy, then picks up some peppy guitars and cymbals for several minutes, which are later joined by excited piratey lyrics. It then fades to a thunderstorm that lasts for several minutes, only to end with… well, for that you have to buy the album. But trust me, it’s brilliant.

Captain Darby O’Bill and His Matees 3, whether we’re discussing the band or the album, is definitely one for the Pirate Core Hall of Fame, if there were such a thing. This is non-traditional pirate music at its very oddest and finest, and something no self-respecting collector should be without.

 
Genre: Artsy, coffee-house songs of a piratey nature
Rating: PG
Target Audience: Teens ta Twenties

Having achieved such a creative marvel with their first album, The Ben Gunn Society, it’s difficult to imagine what the band of the same name would follow up with. After all, the entire album was indeed about Ben Gunn – that cheese-hankerin’ castaway from Treasure Island. So to make a second album that had nothing to do with the old man whatsoever… well, it’s difficult to fathom.

The Ben Gunn Society have addressed the dilema by slightly reinventing themselves in their second album, Sovereignty. They’re very much still the same band, and indeed, and they still have the same wonderful, They-Might-Be-Giants-ish quirkiness. But now they also seem to be the psychodelic free spirits of the pirate community. And if that seems unusual, it’s only because it is – and therein lies the beauty. Goodness knows, the ever-growing pirate music genre needs originality like it needs wenches and grog.

The music of The Ben Gunn Society doesn’t immediately strike fear into one’s heart. It’s generally upbeat and off-center. The opening track, Mutiny is Long Overdue, is a peppy instrumental that won’t exactly conjure images of pirates if the listener isn’t already familiar with The Ben Gunn Society. And for those who are familiar – the opening instrumental quite effectively conjures images of The Ben Gunn Society.

Next up is Don’t Bother to Call on Me, a soul-sharing coffee-house piece about how the singer ain’t budging unless you’re here to recruit him as a pirate. Soft vocals and an almost ticklish guitar combine to make for a song that merges piracy with the artsy college crowd. The Seventh Wave shares this unique, cross-cultural quality, but tells its story slightly more aggressively. Pirate Queen, on the other hand, is something new altogether. Throughout the first album, lead vocalist Igor Koyfman largely defined They Ben Gunn Society’s style – his clear Russian accent is indeed a large part of what makes their music so uniquely wonderful. But for Pirate Queen, fiddler Zarina Silverman takes the mic as she sings the story of a woman unhappy with the genteel life, taking to the seas and turning a’pirate. Zariana hits the ground running, and combined with the energetic music weaves a tale of unladylike behavior and nautical butt-kicking.

With Sunshine and then Dagger, Igor and Zariana take turns at lead vocals. Both songs have great quality and are fun listens, although you have to pay very close attention to determine if they’re actually piratey (based on their first album, The Ben Gunn Society sometimes sneaks in a non-pirate song or two, the tricky scalliwaggs.) Leonard’s Lament then sees a genuine change in pace, with almost a punk-like quality about it. Aggressive guitars and vocals that only barely restrain a scream again sing of events that seem to bounce between normal life and piracy. Room-mates, Rip Van Winkle, and the high seas – this is a song I can’t quite follow. But where Sunshine and Dagger remained a fun listen for me, Leonard’s Lament isn’t quite my cup of grog.

Tannic Wine sees another stark shift – slow and forboding, it has a style about it that would seem a departure from The Ben Gunn Society’s usual upbeat nature. And yet their distinctive sound is still very much present. By and large this seems a pirate-friendly if not pirate-specific song, although there are just enough maritime references to remind you that piracy remains at the soul of this album.

Rat Cotillion is the most whimsical track, being a story of the rats dancing away in the ship’s bilges, while Lord Admiral could almost qualify as cheeky 17th century social commentary against Captain Morgan’s having turned pirate hunter. Both are fine listens, and classical Ben Gunn. The same can easily be said of Broadside and Long Pig, both visiting pirate material, and both very much harken back to the musical styles of the original album.

Leonard’s Salvation is clearly a continuation of Leonard’s Lament, for better or worse. Lucky, to me, is a throwaway song, being a somewhat fluffy song about happiness being treasure enough. The Parrot and the Monkey is a much slower song than one might expect from such a title, and has a somewhat closing feel about it as the parrot flies away and whatnot. Conversely, The End of the Universe has an almost waltzy, hopeful overtone as Igor sings about the demise of all things.

Sovereignty holds up very well as a sequel to The Ben Gunn Society. Fans of the first should very much enjoy the second. It’s in many ways more subtle than the original album – such songs as “I want to Be a Pirate”, “True Pirates”, and “Hey Monkey” left no doubt that it was a pirate album through and through. Instead, Sovereignty takes a more delicate approach – in many cases the music stands out as much as the lyrics, and if you don’t pay attention, you might forget that it’s piratey at all. But piracy is there, have no fear. And whether you’re actively aware that you’re hearing lyrics of pirates or not, odds are you’ll be enjoying yourself just the same.

Genre: Jazzy, beatnick lounge songs. About pirates.
Rating: PG-13
Target Audience: Late teens to early retirement

It may surprise you to learn, I listen to a LOT of pirate music (far more than I’ve yet reviewed, shamefully.) As such, I’m rarely truly surprised. Impressed, certainly – it’s always a treat to hear a new origninal song, or an exciting new presentation of an old song. And it’s always thrilling to learn of a new pirate-rock or pirate-shantey group picking up the torch and lending their talents to create truly original material. BUT, sometimes it feels like I’ve heard it all.

Of course, I’m sometimes forced to eat those words with a song or two. And once in a great while, an entire album comes out that is so new and original that it sideswipes me right off the deck. “Last Voyage of the Black Betty” is one such album.

1. Act I: The Impression of Crew: Piratey spoken word over the backdrop of tavern chatting and squeezebox. Set as intoductory piece of main players in the Black Betty story.

2. Bosun’s Song: Awsome jazzy start. Piratey vocals over brass and drums. Wildly fun and catchy.

3. Black Betty: A lesser song. Still somewhat catchy, but the piratey feel is more understated.

4. Ho, to the Lady: Not sure what to make of this one – falsetto vocals and nautical pirate references. Trombones.

5. The Young Sea Officer’s Sheet Anchor: More than any other song, this track sums up the album. The music is the sort you would hear in any jazz club – rythm guitar and saxaphone and such. The lead vocals are spoken word – a piratey voice reading from the Young Officer’s Sheet Anchor (essentially the equivelant of an 18th century technical manual for sailors) verbatum. And it’s absolutely awsome! Fun to listen to, and funny as all hell. Beatnick piracy.

6. Act II: The Fall of Halmstad: Another spoken piece, driving the story of the Black Betty forward. Piratey vocals over battle sounds and squeezebox.

7. Kill Them Till They’re Dead: A bit of a garage-band detour, but still piratey to the core. Drums and guitars to rough pirate threats and battle talk.

8. Bucket Boy: Without a doubt, the weirdest song on the album. I adore it, find it hilarious, and worry that this might be a sign of my own mental instability. The song features two tones, spliced back and forth throughout, and the contrast is brilliant. One set of vocals is slow and scratchy, and sings of the plight of the ship’s bucketboy. It’s full of references to hard work and sucky days. The other set of vocals is happy and perky, and reflects the bucketboys eternally chipper attitude as he escapes his lousy workaday life and retreats into his own head. It’s peppy and intentionally simplistic, dopey and freaky. And, as stated, it’s weirdly hilarious.

9. Devil’s Children: A peppy, friendly tune about meeting a pirate in a bar, and the tales told by said pirate (to summarize, “don’t be a pirate, laddy, cuz you’ll have fabulous adventures beyond compare and gain wealth beyond measure, but when it’s all done you might have a plight of conscience.”)

10. The Hempen Jig: Again, another jazzy sort of song, this time featuring a variety of pirates singing of their shipmates life – from child to adult scoundrel – as he slowly works his ways to the gallows. A highly original song with in which the humorous tone of the music is offset by the sad sentiment of the subject matter. Definitely one of the several tracks on this album that demostrates real genius in both concept and execution demostrate some real genius.

11. Rowing Down the River of Men: A fast paced tune in which the lyrics quickly summarize the fates of several historical pirates (Stede Bonnet, Anne Bonney, and Captain Kidd.) The only part I can’t figure is the refrain, which – like the title – is simple a repeated “Rowing down the river of men,” which seems to reflect the final doom of the aforementioned scoundrels. I’m not sure how the gallows equate to a river of men, but it remains a catchy tune.

12. Act III: The Destiny of the Black Betty: The final spoken word segment, detailing the Black Betty’s final fate.

13. Still A’smilin’: The album closes with a song of befitting brilliance. A tune of optimism and perseverance in the face of certain death, yet it remains fun and lighthearted. The refrain says it all,

Now I’m,
Out in the ocean,
Floating like an island.
My peg leg for a rudder,
My skivvies for a sail.
Surely I’m a goner,
But I’m still a’smilin’,
For I just walked the plank,
And I lived to tell the tale.

The Last Voyage of the Black Betty is a wonderful album of unrestrained genius. Shanty purists will find little of interest, but those who’s love of piracy goes beyond the historical will find this a CD filled with piratey fun of a truly unique nature. This has quickly become one of the albums I can’t imagine being without, and to my mind Rustmonster has secured itself a place amongst the highest echelon of pirate-themed non-traditional artists, right alongside such esteemed bands as Captain Bogg & Salty and Captain Dan and the Scurvy Crew.

Genre: Alternative pirate carnival punk
Rating: PG
Target Audience: Just about anybody

Some albums are meant of listening, others are meant to be dissected, considered, and analyzed. But Pirates R Us’ CD, Songs of Modern Piracy, is meant for neither – it’s to be loved. True, we could discuss the lyrics – by and large these six songs are about piracy (historical), piracy (illegal filesharing), piracy (breakfast cereal icons), and Kevin Bacon. The words are generally catchy and humorous – Ballad of Captain Crunch is particularly amusing. But every time I try to listen to the lyrics, I keep getting caught up in the music of this album. The vocals and instruments all blend together into a wonderfully whimsical mix of guitars, accordians, tubas and trombones (and something called an erhu, according to the album liner.) The net result is a swaggering russiany carnival of strangely pirate songs that are an absolute joy to listen to. One of my favorite non-traditional pirate albums of all time.

Genre: Non-traditional. True pirate alternative.
Rating: PG
Target Audience: Ages 15 and up

It never ceases to amaze me that one man – Kevin Hendrickson – can simultaneously be behind three pirate-themed bands yet still keep each one distinctive in both content and tone. Captain Bogg & Salty is highly polished, kid-friendly, sometimes silly, and fun throughout. Pirate Jenny is the rock/punk side of things – also silly at times, but relatively grown up, and somewhat raw (in temperament, not quality.) Hucklescary Finn, on the other hand, seems deeply introspective, and musically speaking is certainly the most experimental of the three.

Hucklescary Finn’s previous album, The Last Days of Scamalot, was never available for sale, being instead offered for a limited time via free download. It was full of references to retiring pirates and failing pirate kingdoms. Shortly after, Pirate Jenny was unofficially dissolved. This could lead one to believe Hucklescary Finn might serve as a barometer to Hendrickson’s other pirate projects. I had the opportunity to ask him exactly this, and he denied any intentional hidden messages regarding Pirate Jenny’s fate while recording Last Days.

Intentional or not, I find myself hoping Hucklescary Finn’s new album, Pirates of Scamalot, is as much the indicator that Last Days appeared to be. If it is, then bright days are ahead (dare we hope for a new album from Pirate Jenny?)

The album begins with the short “Treading the Seas of Pirate Gold”. It’s a relatively brief intro, and the only song on this CD that has the trademark piratey “sound” so often heard in Bogg & Salty and Pirate Jenny. It consists of a pirate chorus accompanied by Hendrickson’s familiar voice singing about how he’s been at sea too long, and that it’s high time for a change of pace.

“Storm the Halls” takes us to Scamalot, the magical pirate kingdom referenced in many of Hendrickson’s previous works (Captain Bogg & Salty albums are the notable exception, being as they have their own unique characters seperate from the Scamalot mythos.) It’s a very slow song, which is amusing since it starts with the lyrics, “Gonna kick some pirate ass.” It has a Ulysses-like theme, as Scamalot’s king returns to reclaim his throne.

“Gruel II: Christmas at Sea” is a bit of a sidestep in subject matter as we visit many of the standard Scamalot characters (Scabby, Skreebeard, Perko, and Otis) as they celebrate Christmas as only pirates can (it suddenly strikes me that there aren’t nearly enough Pirate Christmas Carols out there.) A very soft and happy song.

“Scabby Lay Down Your Sword” is very much a folk song, and it seems to depart a bit from the overall theme of Scamalot’s rising. Throughout Scabby is encouraged to put away his piratey tools and explore his softer side. It’s a touching song, featuring vocals and acoustic guitar.

“Ghost Ship” is one of my favorites on this album, and it’s songs like this that make me so thrilled Hendrickson is willing to experiment with such a wide range of styles. It features guitar work that is deeply reminiscent of Pirate Jenny, topped with several new layers that I’ve not heard in any previous work. The repetition in the vocals (“who’s steering the ship-ship”) is strangely unsettling, and therefore works perfectly with the song’s subject matter.

“I Scamalot” is another Pirate Jennyesque triumph, being fast paced and full of wonderful wordplay. With lyrics such as “I scamalot scama little in the middle of another ice age – I jamalot jama little don’t belittle our guitar and drum rage”, it’s an energetic joy to listen to.

“Ukulele Song” is exactly that – a ukulele, with a piano, what I think is an accordian, and the ocean in accompaniment. A very short, but very catchy piece.

“Scamalot Rising” puts the finest point on my previously mentioned hopes that this album bodes well for the future of Scamalot-related projects. The lyrics focus on the return of Scabby’s ship, and even specifically state that “Scamalot is rising from the ashes.” Indeed, I quiver at the very thought that these words are more than just a fanciful song. But that aside, this song is full of hope and energy, and easily an accomplishment in itself.

Up next is the slow and beautiful song “Captain Jennifer” (a name which conjures the image of Pirate Jenny, albeit grown up.) The lyrics themselves speak little of the fate of Scamalot, instead focusing on Captain Jennifer’s willingness to dance and drink tea in the face of danger – stopping to smell the piratey roses, so to speak.

The final song of this album, “Burial at Sea”, was apparently written for Pirate Jenny back in 1993, but has only now found its way to being recorded. It’s a brilliant piece – cryptic and brutal, but not in the usual way. It’s not about violence or bloodshed, but merely the realities (and fantasies) of being buried at sea. Never before have I heard phrases like “pickle my bones,” “our bodies they rot and decay,” and “the fish will make short work of me” used in such blunt manner, and yet somehow transcending their base meanings to become almost haunting and strangely inviting. Just listening to this song makes the idea of my corpse resting on the ocean floor seem fitting and magical (but hopefully not for a very, very long time.)

Pirates of Scamalot is a brilliant album. The instrumental work isn’t as piratey as in the works of Pirate Jenny and Bogg & Salty, but the subject matter of the vocals very much is. It’s a joy to see the mythos of Scamalot carried forward, and I hope Kevin Hendrickson’s psyche has many nooks and crannies yet to explore on this subject. I would first and foremost recommend this album to those who are already fans of Pirate Jenny and Hucklescary Finn. If you’re unfamiliar with their previous works, then the Pirate Jenny’s albums Never Sea Land and Once Upon a Wave would likely make for the best introductions. But once you’ve gotten your feet wet, Pirates of Scamalot will be waiting to take you ever further into this wonderful world of pirate kingdoms, magical scallywags, and waterlogged corpses.

Genre: Contemporary, pirate-themed original. Pirate Alternative.
Rating: G
Target Audience: All Ages

How do you fairly critique something that, at its core, you can’t help but love? The Ben Gunn Society’s self-titled album isn’t as polished as some of its pop-rock-pirate brethren, and its quirky lyrics sung with a russian accent may not appeal to some the more anal members of our fine pirate community. But let’s be honest – this is a brilliantly creative, absolutely delightful album that keeps me smiling from ear to ear each time I hear it.

1) The Ben Gunn Theme – The album wastes no time and plunges us straight into a delightful song about everyone’s favorite castaway, Ben Gunn (shame on you if you said Gilligan.) This piece is slow and lonely, yet fun (much like Ben’s average day, I’d expect.)

2) I Want to Be a Pirate – Next up is a change of pace with a speedy little number about the joys of being a pirate. This song is an absolute delight, and is exactly what They Might Be Giants would sound like if they were pirates (and if they were Russian.)

3) Hey, Monkey! – The title is about a monkey, but most of the song is about bananas. It is every bit as fun and refined as any song about bananas should be. Catchy.

4) True Pirates – True pirates spend all their money on wenches and grog, what more do you need to know? Rockin’ banjos and fun lyrics make for another quirky treat.

5) Providence – More haunting than their other songs, this instrumental piece serves as a nice transition.

6) One Flew Over the Treasure Chest – Peppy and full of cheese references, Ben Gunn tells us what it’s like to be a castaway surrounded by goats and gold. Like much of the album, this track is quirky, catchy, and also brings us back to the They Might Be Giants flavor.

7) Meditation – Instrumental and non-threatening. Nice, but not terribly memorable.

Apples in the Barrel – Perhaps this song, more than any other, best illustrates what I love about this album. Who but the Ben Gunn Society could make lyrics like, “Out on the sea, there is not much in the way of culinary variety”? A fine tribute to John Hawkins’ favorite hiding place.

9) Cosmic Wind – This song marks the albums first departure from the Ben Gunn/pirate theme. Sort of a space-lounge piece about storms in outer space, it’s not really my thing.

10) Ben Gunn – Another visit to the Ben Gunn Theme song, what more can be said? We’ve heard it before, and I still love it. This time it’s a little faster paced, but essentially the same.

11) Red X – Easily my favorite song on the album, Red X combines the story of Treasure Island with a catchy beat and even more mentions of cheese.

12, 13, 14, and 15) Ham Sandwich, Success, No Problem, On the Deck of the Hisponiola – These four songs are all wonderful additions to the album, staying true to the tone and subject matter. But none really stand out enough to bear much individual comment.

16) Black Mountains – I don’t know what this song is about as it’s entirely in Russian. Nice sound to it, though.

17) The Ben Gunn Theme (reprise) – An instrumental conclusion in the tune of Ben Gunn.

As stated, I just love this album. It’s fun, it’s piratey, it’s The Ben Gunn Society.

Genre: Original pirate rock and experimental.
Rating: PG
Target Audience: Ages 15 and up

I imagine that, upon meeting an alien life form for the first time, one would at once feel awed, confused, terrified, and overwhelmed. The experience would be both beautiful and frightening, fascinating yet hopelessly beyond our comprehension. Why am I saying this? No reason. Illegitimus Non Carborundum is a fun, bizarre, perplexing, and incredibly diverse CD. To quote Will Turner form Pirates of the Caribbean, “This is either madness or genius.”

So why am I reviewing this CD? It’s not piratey as a whole, but a significant enough chunk of it is. Five songs in a row, to be specific. We’ll start with these.

The piratey segment of this CD consists of Water Witch, Terror of the Sea, Row, Wreckage, and Washed Ashore. We start with Water Witch, an engergitic piece that’s both peppy yet bizarrely creepy. Terror of the Sea, however, is a song for heroes, or at least men of action. Very manly and catchy – I really like this one, it has sort of a rock-epic feel to it. Row is a mix of a spoken-word and singing. Very very piratey, it consistes largely of a captain shouting out orders at his crew as they go into combat. This song deserves special props for ending with a parrot saying “C’mere, wench!” Wreckage is an intriguing yet brief piece that for some reason reminds me of early spoken-word goth music. Wrapping things up is Washed Ashore, which feels like a mix between the opening credits of the Angel TV series and a modern pirate hair band. All told, the pirate-side of this album is very fun and very different. Washed Ashore didn’t do much for me, but the other four were all very good indeed.

As to the rest of the album – again, madness and genius. It lets you know you’re in for quite a ride with its very first song Monster Surf, an instrumental piece that I can only discribe as Munsters go Bananza in Space. Later songs, like El Chupacabra and Micro Mechanisms, conjure images of a mexican police interrogation while Gwar plays in the background or a march of giant midget robots, respectively. The whole album keeps you on your toes as it traverses many styles, many genres, and many, many strange themes.

If you’re looking for a CD chock full of pirate music, this isn’t it. But if you’re bored with your usual fare and would like to brave new waters, Zakas could certainly shake things up. The five pirate tracks provide an extra incentive, but the rest of the album is certainly an adventure in its own right.

Genre: Contemporary pirate rock and alternative.
Rating: PG
Target Audience: Ages 15 and up

I heard Never Sea Land first. It’s how I was introduced to Pirate Jenny, and how I fell in love with them. So by default, Never Sea Land is my favorite. Were it not for that edge, I might argue that Once Upon a Wave is the slightly better album. Or I might not – I’m really indecisive on this one. In Never Sea Land I was briefly introduced to the character Captain Slaymore. In Once Upon a Wave he returns along with Scabby the seaman. This was when it becomes apparent there is actually a story at works. Scamalot, pirate paradise, is in a state of transition. Its walls are in peril and a new king must rise. Of course, it’s not as straightforward as that, but its close enough.

The song Pirate Jenny, which is not about the band, is a brilliant one. Chatterbox, being mostly instrumental, is an absolute blast. And Kneel Down My Son brings us back splendidly to a Scamalot that can hope for a bright future.

I’d also like to make a special mention of Damn-Fine Sailor. Mostly, it’s just a fun little song. But it also makes the perfect compliment to the song Never Sea Land from their previous album. Where Never Sea Land so touchingly captured all that is bad about life at sea, Damn-Fine Sailor captured that which is so much fun.

Genre: Contemporary pirate rock and alternative.
Rating: PG-13
Target Audience: Ages 15 and up

What can I say about this album? It’s unfair of me to review it, I’m too biased.

I don’t know about you, but I grew up with sea shanties. Schooner Fare and its ilk were what I listened to as a teenager (which is probably why I didn’t get invited to the cool parties.) But in time I needed something different. Enter Pirate Jenny.

Never Sea Land is a brilliant album. It’s fun, it’s serious, it’s touching. A Pirate’s Life is Peaceful (’til Someone Cuts You Up), Island of Harm, and Smiling Skull are all great fun to listen to. The Black Spot, Rowing Galley, and Galleons of War have a bit more depth while remaining a treat. And then, crème de la crème, we have the title track, Never Sea Land. I adore this song in ways I can’t even explain. If you’ve ever served in the navy, and if you ever felt you worked on more of a galley ship than a modern vessel, then this song just might speak to you in the way it did me. If, on the other hand, you’ve been a landlubber your whole life, well, I don’t know what you’ll think of it. But buy the CD anyways.

I guess my only complaint would be their single use of the F-word. I don’t really mind it – it’s used so subtly that you hardly notice it’s there. But its entirely unnecessory (and I don’t mean that in a prudish way) and because of it the album has a big “explicit lyrics” tag next to it on Amazon.com. This makes it look like common trailor-trash, and this album deserves so much better.