On tonight’s Bilgemunky Radio, we were joined LIVE by none other than The Pirates Charles, who kindly offered to share their new album Conquer with us in its entirety. You can buy a digital copy of the album at www.thepiratescharles.com, or wait a month or so for the CD!

1. Pirates R Us – KYAR Pirate Radio (3:55)
2. Pirates Charles – Liberation of the Condemned (1:25)
3. Pirates Charles – GUN (3:23)
4. Pirates Charles – Raise the Whiskey High (4:41)
5. Pirates Charles – I Got Wood (4:22)
6. Pirates Charles – Take Me Far Away (3:59)
7. Pirates Charles – You Can Thank The Pirates Charles (3:51)
8. Pirates Charles – Trouble Left Behind (5:08)
9. Pirates Charles – Curse of the Gypsy (3:54)
10. Pirates Charles – Sand in the Rum (4:01)
11. Pirates Charles – Kyl’grath’ya (5:39)
12. Pirates Charles – The Worm (3:40)
13. Pirates Charles – Talderoy (6:44)
14. Pirates Charles – Go Fuck the Queen (2:58)
15. Pirates Charles – The Star Spangled Banner (4:17)
16. Pirates Charles – This is Victory (3:30)
17. Pirates Charles – M.A.C.C.S.B. (conquer) (6:13)
18. Pirates Charles – The Homecoming (6:01)
19. Rustmonster – Still A’ Smilin (short) (3:31)

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www.thepiratescharles.com

Genre: Pirate folk rock
Rating: PG-13
Target Audience: Pirates. If you don’t love this album, you’re a poser.

A review of The Pirates Charles’ new album Rise almost seems redundant. I mean, it’s The Pirates Charles for crike’s sake! And, as always, this album is full of “almost traditional” music akin to what pirates would have listened to if only they’d thought of it. If you’ve heard their earlier albums, then you know what I mean. And if you’ve ever seen them live, then you know it even moreso.

Actually, the live thing bears some exploration. I’ve been a diehard fan of these guys ever since I first heard LIVE Scallywags. Loved it, loved it, loved it. And yet I was still in no way emotionally or intellectually prepared for seeing the jaw dropping energy that is The Pirates Charles live performance. As Spoo Diggity jumps around the stage, Deeddle rocks his mandolin, Tor shreds his fingers across his flute* – it’s just not an experience that can be conveyed with mere words. Which is why Rise does indeed set a new highwater mark for The Pirates Charles’ CD library – with THIS album, for the very first time, modern recording technology has managed to capture that energy that had previously proven so elusive. And that makes this one of the most powerful CDs in piratedom.

Yes, I’m a Pirates Charles fanboy. But lest you think I’m just mindlessly gushing, let me clarify that my gushing comes straight from the heart (much like Bart Roberts after he took a chestful of grapeshot) – this album will make your boots start jigging (except when they’re stomping), while your brain soundlessly screams, “HOLY FLOCK I’M ON FIRE AND I LOVE IT!!!”

The album begins innocently enough with a Notice of the Disclaimant, being a spoken reading of crimes and such while the rowdy crowd drinks in the background. Drain your rum now, because a brief silence follows before the album suddenly and mercilessly breaks into full speed with Mutiny of the H.M.S. Bounty. If you ignored my advice about the rum, whatever remained in your mug is now splattered across the wall (or your dance partner) as you’re now swinging your arms and legs about in reckless abandon. The album continues with other legendary tracks such as Rise of the Buccaneers, Farewell to Nova Scotia, One Mo’ Bottle o’ Rum, Rye Whiskey, and others – the pace may vary, but the insane levels of piratey awesomeness remain consistently stellar.

And that’s the magic of this album. Generally speaking, pirate and sea music can be very fun. It can be melodic, comical, or haunting. It can make you dance a happy jig. But music that captures the pirate spirit like a rabid genie in a bottle is a rare beast indeed. Rise won’t make you dance, rather, it will make your heart swell with pride as your boots stomp holes into the deck. Your head will move to the music while you recklessly swing your mug or your flintlocks in the air (and hopefully avoid cracking your neighbor’s skull.) Outside observers might think what you’re doing is dancing, but you’ll know this is something significantly more primal.

Buy the CD. Just go buy it already.

*if you giggled and your name is Doglock, go sit in the corner

Mid-June has come and gone, and it was my great pleasure to attend the Northern California Pirate Festival in Vallejo. Having attended this festival each of its three years, I’d love to say that I’ve witnessed it grow into something fantastic, but in this rare case no growth was necessary – never have I seen an event so much hit the ground running as this. The 2009 season proved every bit as worthy an event as its two predecessors as the waterfront park was again converted into a full-on pirate festival for two days during Fathers’ Day weekend.

The first thing that stands out about NorCal is its curbside appeal. While this isn’t a feature many festivals boast, NorCal manages to set a new standard with two enormous ship’s masts that mark the festival entrance. Depending on when you arrive, there might even be a boisterous scalliwag yelling from the rigging. Upon entering the festival proper, the grounds are filled with what must be hundreds of piratey vendors – clothing, weapons, piratey arts and crafts as well as pirate-themed teas and T-shirts. Taking it all in required several passes, as did the food court, which always boasts a variety rarely seen. Maybe it’s a California thing, or maybe NorCal stands alone, but never before at a pirate festival have I seen artichoke hearts, duck and quail, or fried oysters (although the more usual turkey legs and chili dogs are of course available as well.)

Entertainment throughout the day consisted of music by The Pirates Charles )who I still maintain to be one of the best live pirate bands currently in the circuit), shanty legends Skip Henderson and the Starboard Watch, Queen Anne’s Revenge, Mr. Mac, The Roving Tars, and of course Bay Area natives The Seadogs. Non-musical acts included weapons demonstrations by The Brotherhood of Oceanic Mercenaries, and it was also a real treat to finally catch Captain Jack Spareribs’ show, which – get this – is actually really, really funny (Jack Sparrow lookalikes always make me uneasy – as do puppets.)

One of this festival’s other great (and fortunate) assets is the remarkable diversity of its attendees. Sure, there are the normal folk and pirate reenactors – but I’m talking about the vast number of people that find new and creative ways to merge the pirate genre with whatever strikes their fancy. This year alone I saw pirate punks, Pirate Elvis (the ONLY pirate king, imo), pirate zombies, pirate mermaids, pirate sailors, and even a gay pirate bunny. And yes, there were indeed airship pirates, which is rapidly becoming a gristle in my craw, so let me clarify for those of you that need it…

(begin soapbox)
At an event such as NorCal, Airship Pirates are fair game. But this does NOT mean all steampunk is piratey. Steampunk elephant hunters, bug exterminators, or undead railroad conductors have nothing to do with pirates – take that psuedo-victorian sci-fi lark elsewhere.
(end soapbox)

Oh, lest I forget, Saturday night included a new addition to the festival – an afterparty. Held at “The Cantina”, a local mexican restaurant, the first few hours featured music DJed by none other than myself, with The Pirates Charles taking the stage later on to close out the evening in a truly splendid fashion.

To me, the NorCal Pirate Festival remains one of the best in the business. Even the editor of No Quarter Given, Jamaica Rose, who’s likely been to more pirate festivals than anyone on the planet, once told me she places it handily in the top three (alongside Gasparilla and Pirates in Paradise.) Non-pirate types will likely get their fill in one day, but those of us a bit more hopelessly addicted to the subject can flesh out the weekend by getting some one-on-one chat time with such pirate luminaries as Skip Henderson, the reenactors of Tales of the Seven Seas, the crew of Pirates Magazine, pirate artist Richard Becker, and many other folks you’ve likely read about. It’s definitely worth the trek to attend, regardless of where you’re hailing from – just be sure to pack lots of sunscreen.

Genre: Pirate rock/folk.
Rating: R
Target Audience: Fans of pirate-rock or rough, swaggering traditional

It wasn’t that long ago that no one had heard of The Pirates Charles – primarily in that they didn’t yet exist. And yet in only a couple short years, they quickly rose from obscurity into what is arguably one of the best known, best loved, and “truest” pirate bands around. The secret is a rare blend of the traditional and new – sea shanties mixed in with just enough rock&roll to, well, rock, but not so much as to wholly modernize their music. Of course, the icing on the cake is that The Pirates Charles both look and sound the parts of true scallywags – an important factor in the evolution from sea songs to pirate songs.

The Return of David Gale is The Pirates Charles’ third album – second if you don’t count New Steez, which is no longer in print. And like its predecessor, Live Scallywags, it’s a wonderfully irreverent mix of the harmonius and gutteral, the unpolished, unwashed, and yet still strangely presentable. And like all the works of The Pirates Charles, it strikes at the very heart of Pirate-Core.

The album begins with its title track, Return of David Gale. Something of a two part song, it starts with a slow drumbeat and deep vocals of a tribal-esque campfire quality. This soon breaks out into rolling guitars that would almost seem light and jazzy if it weren’t for lead singer Spoo’s brilliantly rough vocals. (It now occurs to me that Mr. Spoo Diggity might actually be the only figure in the pirate community with a name as silly as my own. But I digress.)

The album continues in TPC’s usual style with a few traditional songs re-envisioned in their own image, and a whole stack of original pieces. Highlights include several of their all time greatest songs, such as No One Knows, which proudly displays the band’s remarkable ability to be haunting yet raw all at once as they sing a delightful tune of death at sea – narrated by one of the very victims so recently claimed by a watery grave. Why Am I So Thirsty? tells of a lush who wakes up in bizarre and unflattering circumstances with no recollection of the previous night – and with only one question on his mind, “If I had so much to drink at night, then why am I so thirsty?”

Go F**k the Queen will be a much loved song by anyone that rolls their eyes at the courtly customs found at Ren Faire. God Save the Queen? Hardly. This song is rollicking and shameless. Whiskey In the Jar goes on to feature one of the album’s more jig-worthy songs (most are more suited to a pirate mosh-pit full of aimless jumping and bouncing). Less sinister than the well-known Metallica cover, it’s also significantly saltier (but we’d expect no less.)

Rise of the Buccaneers is clearly a definitive TPC song – brazen, aggressive, and perfect for stomping to the beat while Spaniards cower in the deck below. With lyrics full of cutlasses, wounds, and all sorts of other pirate staple items, it just might be one of the grandest pirate songs out there.

The Return of David Gale features 17 tracks. Some stand out more than others, but there’s not a dud amongst them. By my rough estimate, I’d say 12 of these are originals, with the other five being traditional. Oh, and then there’s the 18th track, found tucked into the tail end of the 17th if you listen to the silence long enough. This bonus song is the most heart-wrenching, dramatic rendition of Farewell to Nova Scotia I’ve ever heard, and almost makes the album worth buying all by itself.

This is a definite must-have album. Fans of modern pirate music will love the rock attitude that steeps through the music and lyrics throughout, while even hardcore fans of traditional sea music will enjoy the new takes on their traditional favorites (and I’m not just saying that – I’ve spoken with several traditionalists who don’t give a rat’s ass about Pirate-Core, and yet they know – and love – The Pirates Charles.)

The Pirates Charles on FHF 97.1 Free FM

The Pirates of Sacramento are holding a Pirate Ball to benefit a haunted house that fell on tough times. But more important? The Pirates Charles will be performing!!! It’s all happening on January 24th.

Genre: Pirate shanty-punk
Rating: R
Target Audience: Pirates. Drunken, brazen, shameless pirates.

Sometimes it seems as if there’s three kinds of music in this world – good music, bad music, and pirate music. The Pirates Charles’ album LIVE Scalliwaggs would entirely qualify as pirate music.

It’s certainly an oversimplification with more exceptions than rules, but for argument’s sake let’s assume that pirate music differs from good music in that it lacks much of the polish and harmony that is generally considered necessary to make a song worth listening to. But it differs from bad music in that, while rough and raw, it’s still strangely catchy and easy on the ears. And that’s the Pirates Charles.

With the first song, Take Me to Cat Island, The Pirates Charles come across as jovial and shameless in their performance. The recording has a few technical hiccups in the quality, and the music and vocals are entirely jagged, but these are vastly overshadowed by the sheer enthusiasm of the song. What’s more, The Pirates Charles’ rough presentation is so wonderfully perfect that it’s hard to believe it isn’t secretly (and masterfully) contrived. These are not dashing rogues or classy entertainers – these are smelly, smelly pirates, and yet you want to party with them just the same. And, you certainly want to sing along.

The second track, Pirates Charles Anthem, is a bit more aggressive than was the first, and it really works. A prideful song about how awesome it is to be a Pirate Charles, and how being anything else just sucks in comparison. Later songs go on to range all over the place – some songs fast, some slow. Some happy, some somber (but never sober.) Many are R rated and irreverent (Castrate the Governor, Man with Fuller Pants, Cat Island Whores) while others take a different approach. Master and Commander particularly stands out. Where most of the songs on the album truly push the envelope of crusty, shanty punk, Master and Commander takes a much more lyrical tack. Actually sung (rather than melodiously yelled), it brings strong phantoms of Tendacious D and makes for a wonderful change of pace.

Rowmans Row is another song that stands out. Haunting guitars and drums introduce brutal cries of “stroke”, which contrast well with the forboding vocals detailing the Norsemen’s seemingly endless journeys across the sea. The lyrics suit the content, but this song also goes one better in conjuring a true, woeful atmosphere of iceburgs and eternal rowing.

At 17 tracks, this album is an abundance of piratey brilliance. Most of the songs come from the rough, scratchy, banjo and guitar school of music – sometimes jiggy, sometimes aggressive, and sometimes adventurous. While truly unique songs (compared to the rest of the album) such as Master and Commander and Rowmans Row are a rarity – and stand out all the more because of it – the remainder are still surprisingly diverse in pace, content, and attitude. That such a primitive facade can conceal music so entirely engrossing is a major feat. Oft times a true pirate song requires a good dose of rum to be enjoyable, but with LIVE Scalliwaggs, you feel drunk from the music alone (although on principle, rum is still recommended.)