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www.hotpiratebabes.com

I’m still putting 2008 on my checks, and here comes the 2010 Hot Pirate Babes Calendar. How the time flies.

I’ve reviewed the previous three incarnations of this calendar, so feel free to read those reviews if you *really* need an explanation of just what a “hot pirate babes” calendar contains. The rest of us, however, shall jump into the nuts and bolts of the matter and consider just what 2010 appears to have in store.

As with other years, the 2010 calendar features a range of pirate babes, some of whom hit the “hot” mark with more grace than others. Five months, in fact, offer babes of reasonably passable hotness. February brings us a gypsy gal for those who prefer their girls to exercise a little modesty (in the face, if not exactly elsewhere), [read more »]

Since when did an overflowing treasure chest lead to controversy, I ask? It seeems that an antique store’s choice to display a large-breasted pirate statue has the local clergy up in arms.

[read more »]

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www.piratesxxx.com

Following its release in 2006, Pirates: A Joone Film made movie history. Not only was it the highest budgeted adult film ever, but it was also the first to cross over into mainstream cinema. By cutting the bulk of the sex scenes to establish an R rating, the remaining film was still highly enjoyable – a feature in stark contrast to the adult film stereotype, and certainly a commendable achievement.

Like its presumed inspiration, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Pirates: A Joone Film was a daunting undertaking that was successfully achieved thanks to the “outside of the box” thinking of the production crew, writers, and direction. And also like the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, Pirates: A Joone Film’s sequel, Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge managed to fall into a common trap – namely production value over plot. [read more »]

Provocateur has released a line of Pirate lingerie. Well, sort of. The pictures look awfully piratical, but if you check out which items are actually for sale all the good pieces seem to be just for the photo shoot. This image, for example – the only item they’re selling is the bottom with the suspenders. I mean, what now? Without the coat and boots, how the hell is leather leather hot pants with suspenders even remotely piratey? Or sexy, for that matter?

Nice try, I guess. But I’m not as impressed as I wish I were.

Rating:
www.hotpiratebabes.com

So here it is mates – the review you’ve come to look forward to this time each year. The temperatures may drop, the leaves may fall, and the breeze up your slops may have a bit more bite to it than you generally prefer. But at least we have one thing to look forward to – meeting the 12 pirate babes with whom we’ll be sharing the coming year.

If you’re like me (and I know you are) then you view this time with anticipation and trepidation alike. After all, it’s not every day we learn what sort of lasses will be staring at us from our wall for the next twelve months, and I already know I’ll like some more than others (which is always awkward.) Take 2008, for example. Calendar-wise I’d say it was a pretty good year, although I never could come to terms with Ms. July’s over-eager grin – I just *knew* she’d slipped something in that mug she was holding up. And Ms. September left me feeling mighty uncomfortable and fearful for 30 long days. May and June, however, could have gone on forever, for all I cared. But this is the crux of the Hot Pirate Babes – artist and photographer Tiger Lee has generously invested his year scouring the ends of the Earth to select for our enjoyment 12 pirate beauties – some being women of action, others of mystery, and still others of, well, you know. It’s like having your very own harem selected on your behalf by a guy you’ve never met. And being as tastes can so widely vary from one bloke to another, we can only hope he knows what he’s doing. So let’s take a look and find out… [read more »]

If you love pirates, and you love, er, “adult” entertainment, then get ready for an exciting September! Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge is fast approaching! Not much in way of specifics as yet, but from the poster I’d wager they read my review of the first movie in which I commented that it was a little blonde-centric. Looks to me like we now have brunette’s trumping the blondes by a 5-2 margin. Not that I care really, so long as at least one of them satisfies the “braided bad-ass” vacancy left by Serena from the first film (and I’m betting on the chick second from the left.)

View a teaser at www.digitalplayground.com/mov/pirates2teaser.html. Don’t worry, it’s just a skeleton in a storm, so nothing naughty yet.

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Hot Pirate Babes
www.hotpiratebabes.com

As if the year wasn’t going by fast enough, it seems that 2008 calendars are now on the market. It’s a notion I find frightening, but at least the 2008 Hot Pirate Babes Calendar is here to give us a more inviting taste of what’s in store for the coming year.

I’ve previously reviewed the 2007 Hot Pirate Babes Calendar, and I’m pleased to note that 2008 will carry forth in the fine precedent set – that being one of hot babes (appropriately enough) gussied up in pirate gear and holding pirate accessories in pirate settings and striking pirate poses. It’s a simple enough formula (at least on paper), and one that works rather well. [read more »]

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Hot Pirate Babes
www.hotpiratebabes.com

How many times have a bunch of blokes been sitting together and come up with the brilliant notion, “hey, we should make a calendar of hot pirate babes!” Without a doubt, the idea has been tossed about many a time. But for some reason it wasn’t until 2007 that someone actually took the project to task. And thus was born Tiger Lee’s “Hot Pirate Babes Calendar”, being the ultimate in aptly titled products this side of the Grand Canyon.

Hot Pirate Babes features 12 months of seagoing beauties – each of them armed. And while most are somewhat under-dressed for combat, many nonetheless sport combative snarles that make it clear they have something other than amore on their minds. I mention this point because it’s a subject that draws wildly different reactions from different viewers. The calendar’s cover, in fact, features a buxom blonde firing her pistol and bearing her pearly whites in a manner that says anything but “come hither.” (Unless, of course, it’s “come hither so I may gut you like a spaniard.”) In my own experience scorned women have proven best avoided, and aren’t something I would normally opt to pin to my wall (we’re talking calendars, remember.) Some of my mates, however, have clearly differed on this subject, and expressed that a warlike countenance can be quite the turn-on. [read more »]

Rating:
www.piratesxxx.com

Let’s just make one thing clear from the start – this is an adult film, albeit with all the truly naughty bits edited out to acheive an R rating. That’s not some sort exageration to make a point, it’s a fact – you can buy the unedited version online through many sources. This review, however, concerns the R version.

It’s important to recognize that this is an edited adult film, as without this knowledge you might be perplexed at how readily the characters get “snuggly” with each other, even in the most unlikely of circumstances (inside a burning barn, for example.) These scenes don’t get terribly graphic – I’ve seen much more explicit in any number of mainstream movies, although rarely in such frequency. Many of the scenes, in fact, are cut short before they’ve even properly begun. That said, this still isn’t a film to share with your 13 year old kids, as sexual context is there in abundance, as are brief images of writhing bodies, and more than a few naked breasts. [read more »]

excerpt from
“The Devil Wore Purple Plunder-Pants”
an upcoming romance novel from Bilgemunky Press

note: The following story and characters are works of fiction. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead, and especially any resemblance to Keira Knightly, super sexy star of Pirates of the Caribbean, is entirely coincidental.

Chapter 5 – Inside the Contessa’s Chamber

Bam! Crash! Strangle! Boom!

The Contessa de Salma tightly clenched a stiletto to her silky bosom as she stared at her bedchamber door with an intensity that would surely whither the spine of even the most courageous of men. Unfortunately for her, it was no mere man that currently decimated her soldiers in the hallway – it was a demon of the sea, a mad beast driven by love and rage – love for his beloved Keira Knightly, who had looked really hot in that red dress in Pirates of the Caribbean, and rage at having had her torn from his mighty arms by the dastardly Don Squishy, scourge of four out of five Great Lakes. [read more »]