The Pirates! In an Adventure with Ahab
by Gideon Defoe
Back in the charming days of yesteryear (I think it was 2004), Gideon Defoe took the literary world by storm with his groundbreaking novelette, “The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists.” Never before had the gritty world of pirates been so vividly realized, complete with the utmost attention to both historical accuracy and poetic beauty.
I am, of course, full of it.
Like its predecessor, Defoe’s second work, “The Pirates! In an Adventure with Ahab” is sure to throw humorless historians into a tissy. But for the rest of us, it’s another wonderfully demented bit of comedic genius. Once again we’re invited to follow the adventures of a hapless crew of no-name pirates (“The Pirate Captain”, “The Pirate with a Scarf”, “The Pirate Who was Good at Math” and such), this time as they seek a way – any way – to gather the needed money to pay off a debt to the most dangerous of villians, Cutlass Liz. They attempt to gain said loot through a range of efforts, from improv-theater to whaling to out-right pirating. Continue reading
This was bad. Really bad. But it was also amusing, which makes it kind of good.
Jolly Roger features all the typical elements of most teeny-bopper straight-to-video slasher flicks in the vein of such classics as “Leprechaun in the Hood” and “Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman” – a supernatural villian in search of his treasure kills many people along the way, some of whom get naked first. And while the costume of Jolly Roger himself is actually quite impressive, not much else is. Unbelievably, the best scene in the whole movie, in which Jolly Roger has a heart-to-heart while sharing rum with a bartender, got edited out – you can view it in the “deleted scenes” segment of the DVD.
Jolly Roger is bad. But watch it anyways. If you’re old enough to drink, watch it drunk. If you’re not, well, wait until you’re 21, and then watch it drunk.