Review: Plantation Rum – Jamaica

Rating: ★★★★☆
Plantation Rum – Jamaica

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from Internet Wines and Spirits

Sit back lad, ‘n let me tell ye what must beware ‘o the jamaican wenches. A comely lass she was, sharp as a tack and hard as granite. She caught me eye with her heady air and irreverent ways. I knew I wuz outta me league, but wuz intrigued, not the less. Like a cutlass doused in butter she wuz – creamy smooth yet brutal n’ jagged. Me own mother taught me well ta steer clear o’ woman such’s this, yet still I went in ta steal a kiss. The initial rush wuz intense n’ damnably near set me mouth ablaze. Musky smooth as silk, her lips they wuz, yet penetratin’ n’ consumin’. Like starin’ the sun in the eye, me deadlights swelled up with pleasure n’ pain alike. ‘N as I stood there like a daft loper recoverin’, the strumpet snagged me purse ‘n made off with the barkeep. ‘N thas why I say ta ya, lad – watch them jamaican’ lasses like hawks!

Jamaica Plantation Rum is good, but not in a benevolent way. It will kick you in the face and call you sally with such an intensity of brilliantly rummy flavors that will suck you in and tear you to shreds. Respect it, enjoy it, fear it.

One thought on “Review: Plantation Rum – Jamaica

  1. Spot-on review. I found this rum in a small liquor store near my office and it became an instant favorite. It’s a great rum but it’ll bite you. Not unlike Gosling’s Black Seal, another favorite of mine, in the sense that you have to suffer a little initial pain but it’s worth it for the reward. Sadly, the liquor store that sold it went out of business and I have yet to find it anywhere else. I’m kicking myself for not buying a case when I had the chance.

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