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www.thebrigands.com
Genre: Contemporary Pirate Folk.
Rating: X
Target Audience: Adults who enjoy a swarthy jig alongside pirate porn 😉
The cover. My god, the cover. It’s an ass. At first glance, I thought it was a rashed, diseased ass. But no, it’s an ass with a map of the world. I don’t know if that makes me feel better or not. Continue reading
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Following its release in 2006, Pirates: A Joone Film made movie history. Not only was it the highest budgeted adult film ever, but it was also the first to cross over into mainstream cinema. By cutting the bulk of the sex scenes to establish an R rating, the remaining film was still highly enjoyable – a feature in stark contrast to the adult film stereotype, and certainly a commendable achievement.
Like its presumed inspiration, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Pirates: A Joone Film was a daunting undertaking that was successfully achieved thanks to the “outside of the box” thinking of the production crew, writers, and direction. And also like the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, Pirates: A Joone Film’s sequel, Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge managed to fall into a common trap – namely production value over plot. Continue reading
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Pirate Code
by Helen Hollick
Having previously read and reviewed Sea Witch by Helen Hollick, I was looking forward to checking out its sequel, Pirate Code, which seems to begin mere moments after Sea Witch concluded. We immediately join up with the tale’s protagonists, pirate Jesemiah Acorne and his – well, girlfriend I suppose (being as they’re so devoted to one another, girlfriend seems too weak a term. But since she’s married to another, she really can’t be otherwise), the witch Tiola. Tiola and Jesemiah are well occupied dealing with the difficulties of Tiola’s husband, who refuses to grant a divorce – but this distraction is soon eclipsed by the larger issue of England going to war with Spain, followed by Governor Woodes Rogers’ revocation of pirate amnesties for the purpose of pressing all able seamen into service. Continue reading
If you love pirates, and you love, er, “adult” entertainment, then get ready for an exciting September! Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge is fast approaching! Not much in way of specifics as yet, but from the poster I’d wager they read my review of the first movie in which I commented that it was a little blonde-centric. Looks to me like we now have brunette’s trumping the blondes by a 5-2 margin. Not that I care really, so long as at least one of them satisfies the “braided bad-ass” vacancy left by Serena from the first film (and I’m betting on the chick second from the left.)
View a teaser at www.digitalplayground.com/mov/pirates2teaser.html. Don’t worry, it’s just a skeleton in a storm, so nothing naughty yet.
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Salty Dick
www.saltydick.com
Genre: Traditional
Rating: XXX
Target Audience: Adults with deviant minds
The album is titled “Salty Dick’s Uncensored Sailor Songs”, and never was a product more truly labeled. This CD is packed with 21 of the most offensive songs you’ll ever hear. Continue reading
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www.piratesxxx.com
Let’s just make one thing clear from the start – this is an adult film, albeit with all the truly naughty bits edited out to acheive an R rating. That’s not some sort exageration to make a point, it’s a fact – you can buy the unedited version online through many sources. This review, however, concerns the R version.
It’s important to recognize that this is an edited adult film, as without this knowledge you might be perplexed at how readily the characters get “snuggly” with each other, even in the most unlikely of circumstances (inside a burning barn, for example.) These scenes don’t get terribly graphic – I’ve seen much more explicit in any number of mainstream movies, although rarely in such frequency. Many of the scenes, in fact, are cut short before they’ve even properly begun. That said, this still isn’t a film to share with your 13 year old kids, as sexual context is there in abundance, as are brief images of writhing bodies, and more than a few naked breasts. Continue reading