Review: Bottell

Rating: ★★★★★
Leather Lore

Let’s face it – by and large, most of our pirate gear and garb is just for show. True, some of us look to acquire higher quality, functional clothing that will stand up to the elements and spaniards alike, while others opt for strictly “fashionable” items that serve no purpose except to look awsome and piratey. And this is what makes a Leather Lore Bottell stand apart – it’s virtually a practical necessity.

Bottells are basically leather canteens. They’re available in either pitch or wax lining (pitch allows for more colors, while wax restricts you to black or brown. Wax, however, is safer for use with hard liquors, i.e. RUM!) and in 16 or 32 oz capaicities. The cork is turned wood held in place with a leather cord – not one item of modern material is present. They’re solid and rigid, and though the manufacturer does warn that it’s possible to crush and ruin them, they seem very sturdy and well-built. Continue reading

Review: Pirate Goblet

Rating: ★★★★½
Captain Goldtooth Pirate Pottery

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – nothing spoils a glorious pirate personna faster than drinking out of a dixie cup. You may be the meanest scalliwagg around, complete with glorious brocade coat and a bicorn hat that eclipses the sun, but if you’re sipping your rum from a disposable plastic container, you still look a ninny.

Fortunately there are options – pewter and stoneware solutions are on the rise, from tankards to flasks to onion bottles. Pirates can select from the extremely fancy to the simple and rustic. Personally, it’s the rustic I often like best, as it seems most suited to the consumption of rum. And it’s in this way that Goldtooth Pottery truly shines. But if you’re not a rum fan, don’t let that stop you. Goldtooth drinking vessels are just as suited for the drinking of Kill Devil, Bomboo, Flip, Grog, or just plain ol’ distilled molasses. Continue reading

Review: Rum Jug

Rating: ★★★★☆
Quicksilver’s Pirate Pots

Grog – water, sugar, lime, and rum. It’s as simple as it is beautiful, with a name that rolls off the tongue and a taste that rolls right back in. Say it with me now – grog.

Of course, you can’t generally buy grog. You have to make it. Which means you need something to serve it in (and your plastic Kool-Aid pitcher doesn’t count.) Now, nancy-boy spaniards might be fine with a cut-crystal punch bowl. But you and me – we have our pride. And we have Quicksilver’s Pirate Pots and their line of jugs. Available in three sizes, these are the perfect vessel for your piratey concoctions. From one to four quarts, your masterpiece will be held safely within, right up until pouring it for your wide-eyed guests, who can only guess what sort of magic might spring forth from such a piece of tablewear. Select black or lichen green (think Davey Jone’s ship color, more or less), these bottles come emblazoned with skull&crossbones, or with the words “grog” or “rum”, for the extra-organized. And they’re even available with custom inscriptions, for those what have something special to say.

Like all of Quicksilver’s line, these jugs are food and dishwasher safe, leave no taste, and look fantastic. Well worth checking out.

Review: Etched Glass Flask and Leather Pouch

Rating: ★★★½☆
Pyrate Leatherworx

*note: I adore and endorse the craftsmanship of Pyrate Leatherworx. However, I’ve received many reports of late from dissatisfied customer regarding poor communication and long overdue orders. Prior to placing an order based on this review, I strongly urge you to first read these comments from concerned readers.

Pyrate Leatherworx’ etched flask and pouch set is basic accessorization at its finest – a basic glass flask with a jolly roger etched into its face, along with a rugged leather pouch, held shut with a doubloon and leather strap.

Little need be said of these items – except that the glass is roughly cast for that old timey feel, and various designs are available to choose from. And the pouch is a fine and functional costume item, with or without the flask (I find it terribly useful when wearing costumes without pockets.) Continue reading

Review: Custom Leather Tankard

Rating: ★★★☆☆
Scurvvy Dawgs

One of the best things about being a pirate (aside from rum and wenches) is that there is no uniform. We’re each free to pick from a near endless variety of colors, styles, and accessories to look our unique piratey self (and if many uniquely choose to look like Jack Sparrow, hey, who am I to judge?)

So, let’s say you’ve already created a wholey unique pirate wardrobe? What’s next? How’s about a truly unique, custom made leather tankard? Personally, I know I could spend forever and a day searching for that perfect mug that just screams “Bilgemunky” – all to no avail. But as you can see from the photo, I gots me one! This is thanks entirely to They make a variety of leather goods, but it’s the tankard that I’ve had the pleasure to experience first-hand. All I had to do was provide a picture of what I wanted, they embellished that with their own colors and stylizations, and there it was – a lovely tankard that is truly worthy of the Bilgemunky. Continue reading

Review: Tankard and “Warning Shot”

Rating: ★★★★☆
Quicksilver’s Pirate Pots

It may come as a surprise, but I throw a fairly sizeable Talk Like a Pirate Day party each year. This past September I’d planned out my outfit very carefully, having much of it custom made. Large hat, wool frock coat, bucket boots… I hope it’s not overly bragging to say that I looked quite dashing, and I have pictures to prove it. But that’s where the problem strikes; in each of these pictures – me looking all piratey with my new duds and swashbuckling grin – in each of these pictures I’m holding my piratey beverage in a plastic cup. PLASTIC! Hell, I won’t wear socks unless they’re piratey, and yet here I have a photo album full of me in pirate garb drinking from a plastic cup. I feel such shame. Continue reading